If you compare marriage equality to interracial marriage, put your money where your mouth is

Stuff is happening with marriage equality and the plebiscite clusterfuck, some of which might have changed by the time you read this post. If you’re not up to speed: a strong majority of MPs support marriage equality but due to the right wing faction of the Coalition, the current issue is still the (probably dead) plebiscite which is opposed by 85% of LGBT people and will be a disaster for these very scientific reasons as well as the inevitable (already happening!) hateful propaganda of a No campaign plus the problem (already happening!) of someone’s rights being up for an opinion poll.

I don’t know what will happen in this mess over the next days, weeks or months but I do know that I want to again give unsolicited advice about this to straight Australians who plan to vote yes if a plebiscite were held. I don’t really have any advice for LGBT people (they’ve had enough straightsplaining about how they should be reacting) or those who plan to vote no (who are unlikely to be convinced at this stage)/

It’s become popular in the last few years to compare this civil rights movement to the historical movement for legalising interracial marriage. The arguments presented against marriage equality are pretty much the ones that were given against interracial couples in an age when it was known as “miscegenation”. Like interracial marriage, it should be a no-brainer. Like interracial marriage the change came ahead of public opinion and people thought the sky would fall. And so forth.

It’s not the same thing and making too close a distinction would be problematic. Still, there are many strong comparisons, but those of us making them have shied away from the conclusions. The truth is, interracial marriage has been part of the social fabric for much longer and so is more acceptable. Conversely, opposition to same sex marriage is socially less unacceptable — even to those of us who support marriage equality. Since none of us are immune from homophobia even if we consciously think we don’t discriminate.

I’ve seen plenty of debate among straight people who all plan to vote Yes but have different views of whether the plebiscite is a good thing, whether fears of hate speech during a No campaign are overblown etc etc. Rather than address these directly I think it’s easier to make the interracial comparison more literal. So:

• If interracial marriage were illegal today and up for a popular vote, would you be against that popular vote in principle (regardless of polling)? Then be against it now.
• If interracial marriage were illegal today, would you take concerns about what a No campaign would bring seriously? Then do it now.
• If interracial marriage were illegal today, would you oppose a plebiscite where the No side would get public funding to present arguments from phrenology, fraudulent IQ studies etc? Then oppose this plebiscite.
• If interracial marriage were illegal today, would you avoid telling interracial couples how they’re hurting their cause with their militancy? How they’re too quick to demonise people who would vote No as…dum dum dum…”racist”? How they’re mistrusting the Australian electorate to do the right thing by them and mercifully grant them the gift of their Yes vote? Then avoid these things now.
• If interracial marriage were illegal today, would you ever tell someone who’s never been able to get married in their life that they’re “overreacting”? Then don’t do it now.
• If interracial marriage were illegal today, would you call/write/email your MP explaining (in more polite language or not, whatever your style) just how fucked this is? Then call/write/email your MP now.
• If interracial marriage were illegal today and a No campaign was getting $7.5M of public funding and many millions more in private donations, would you donate to the Yes side? Would you help dilute the airwaves and reduce the phrenology ratio? Then donate now.
• If interracial marriage were illegal today and mixed race couples were being vilified in a way that affected mental and physical health, would you donate to organisations that provide them with valuable services? Then find, donate now.
• If interracial marriage were illegal today, would you avoid getting married so as not to participate in an institution that was so blatantly discriminatory and white supremacist? Then avoid getting married now.
• If interracial marriage were illegal today and getting married required the ceremonial reading of a racist legal clause, a clause that was a perfect summation of the law’s cruel intent (“to the exclusion of all others”), would you not attend weddings until such crap didn’t have to be read out? Then don’t attend weddings now.
• If interracial marriage were illegal today, would you allocate the appropriately low amount of attention to the idea that the biggest risk is No voters being ostracised as racist as opposed to the interracial couples affected by the legislation? Then allocate your attention appropriately now.
• If interracial marriage were illegal today, could you be friends with someone who planned to vote No? Then be friends with them now.

I’m not saying you would or should do all of these things — you do you. But if we all really believed there was a comparison between marriage equality and interracial marriage you might act differently than you’re acting now. I reckon we might do more.

We should take the comparison seriously.